How Not to Screw Up the Way Your Kids Move
Share
Quick answer: Your kid's movement DNA is mostly set between the ages of 2 and 8. Whatever pattern they default to in that window is what they will default to as adults. Most parents are not screwing it up on purpose. They are just handing kids the same broken cues they were given. This is what to stop saying, and what to do instead.
The window most parents miss
There is a window in your kid's life when their movement is most programmable. Between the ages of 2 and 8. We call it the Two-Eight Window.
What happens in that window decides more about how your kid moves for the rest of their life than almost anything else you will spend time on. The patterns they repeat in those years become the default patterns they will use as adults. Not just on a field or in a gym. When they walk. When they sit. When they pick something up. When they chase their own kid one day.
If they learn good movement patterns in that window, they get to spend the rest of their life inside a body that works. If they learn bad ones, they will spend their adult years trying to undo the wiring that got laid down before they could write their own name.
Most parents have no idea this window exists. Not their fault. The window never gets talked about.
The way kids learn movement
Kids learn how to move the same way they learn how to talk. They watch you. They listen to you. They copy you.
Each cue you give them, they take literally. Each motion you model, they mirror. When you walk in the door, they walk like you. When you sit down at the table, they sit like you. When you yell "lift your knees" at a track meet, they translate that the exact way their body wants to translate it, and that translation becomes their default for the next 70 years.
This is why throwing cues at kids without thinking is so risky. Movement is being programmed whether you mean to program it or not.
What you are probably doing that hurts them
Most parents do not screw up their kids' movement on purpose. They just hand down the same cues that were handed to them. Cues built on what movement looks like instead of what movement actually is.
"Stand up straight." Kids hear that and shoot their chin to the sky, which drops the hips. Hips down kills everything below it.
"Lift your knees." The knee is a joint. It does not drive anything. The thigh is the piston. Cue the knee and the focus goes to the wrong body part.
"Pump your arms." Forward pump pulls the hands up by the face, crosses the body, and drops the hips. The backward swing is what actually generates speed.
"Run faster." Effort without efficiency just burns more energy doing the wrong thing. They were not running slowly because they were not trying. They were running slowly because the pattern was off.
Each of those cues is well-intentioned. Each of them locks in the wrong default.
Quick sidebar while we are here. I keep a tin of Neuro Gum next to my keyboard when I write these posts. One piece, a few minutes, and the fog lifts before the first sentence lands. Caffeine and L-theanine, no crash. You can find it here: Neuro Gum. (Affiliate link. I earn a small commission at no extra cost to you.)
What to do instead
Three things. Start here.
Model it yourself. Kids copy what they see. If you want them to move well, move well in front of them. Walk tall. Swing your arms back. Drive your thigh up when you jog. They are watching even when you don't think they are.
Use cues that point at the right body part. "Tall hips" instead of "stand up straight." "Thigh drive" instead of "lift your knees." "Swing back" instead of "pump your arms." Each swap moves the focus from what the motion looks like to what the body is actually doing.
Let them be silly. Kids learn movement through play. Make it a game. Race them. Hop with them. Have them try to swing their arms backward and laugh when they get it wrong. The lesson sticks deeper when it feels like fun than when it feels like correction.
It is never too late, but the earlier the better
If your kid is already past 8, do not panic. The window is the optimal time, not the only time. The same fixes still work. They just take more repetition and more intention the further out from the window you get.
But if your kid is still in the window right now, this is the cheapest movement insurance you will ever buy. A few good cues, modeled consistently, can save them a lifetime of trying to fix patterns that were never planted right.
The whole system is in the book
This blog gives you the headline. The book gives you the playbook.
If We Knew Better, We'd Move Better: The Seeds of Movement lays out the Two-Eight Window in full. The cues I use, the cues I cut, and the patterns worth planting in a kid before they hit 8. If you are a parent, a teacher, a coach, or anyone with kids in your life, this is the book I wish adults were handed at the hospital.
Want hands-on help?
If you coach a youth program, a team, or a school, and you want help building a movement literacy curriculum your kids will actually carry with them, book a call. We work with coaches and programs to set this up the right way for your athletes, your age group, and your goals.
Go deeper. The thinking in this post comes straight from my book, If We Knew Better, We'd Move Better. And when you are ready to train these patterns with the tool built for them, feel the difference with the Two8 Bands set. You can also grab the set on Amazon.
Some links in this post are affiliate links. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases, at no extra cost to you.
#CoachStokesSaidSo